On Ambition
I’m so small in the grand scheme of things, so is all this work worth it?
It’s not a secret that I’m a huge Sims 3 addict. Well, was, I’m kind of on hiatus at the moment because of an incident involving a laptop, a dog, and a cup of tea, but I’m a simmer nonetheless, and I often think about how I’m like a sim. Not in the sense that I think there is a plumbob over my head or that I’m in living in fear of being trapped in a tiny room, starving to death whilst pissing myself as my creator watches over me laughing, but rather I have all these wishes (and not forgetting my lifetime wish) that I need to fulfil to make me feel, well, fulfilled.
I’ve been told, by a number of people that I’m, and I quote, “super ambitious” or, as my best friend like to say, “a productive bitch.” And I guess I am. I like being productive, and I like having goals and targets and being able to go to sleep at night knowing my day wasn’t completely wasted.
And I think, sometimes, “what is the point of my life?” I’m so small in the grand scheme of things, so is all this work worth it? Maybe I won’t even live to see this all unwrap into something wonderful, maybe it never will. And I think, even though I’m a teenager so what the hell do I know, the answer is yes.
I think everyone has been told or told someone to “live a little,” “let your hair down” or something along those lines. I don’t believe I’ve ever said the phrases above, unless it was ironically (because, if I’m honest, most of the things I’ve ever said have been ironically) but they’ve certainly been said to me. Not just by kids my age, oh no, by adults too, so when I do “let my hair down” and then get told to “rein it in a bit” and “get my act together,” it’s annoying.
But this isn’t an article on why adults are hypocrites. And maybe I should live a little more by #YOLO and a little less by #SOLB (Study or Live Begging) because maybe these are the ‘best days of my life’ and I should go to every party that I’m not invited to, drink until I need a liver transplant and do drugs whilst my body can take them. But it doesn’t seem to be the best idea.
These things, I assume, are “fun” because of the masses of people who seem to enjoy doing this stuff, but they don’t do it for me (then again, and this is a note to my parents, I’ve never experienced drugs, because as you said Dad, there’s a time and place for drugs— University). Because, and I’m not sure about everyone else, but as I said before, I actually kind of like being productive. I enjoy doing stuff, I enjoy seeing things I’ve done and I like having stuff to do. I enjoy knowing things, and expanding my knowledge and learning about the world developing around me, as well as having the idea that one day I will have accomplished what I set out for myself when I was a kid, and I think that is the ultimate high (because, kids, drugs are never the answer, and we should set out to be more in life than junkies, and yep, this was your obligatory ~~DRUGS R BAD~~ propaganda from your favourite online magazine!!!).
I think what I’m trying to say is there is reason to be inspired to do stuff. Behind all the Kardashians of the world, there are people who have done stuff with their lives and produced things that will be remembered for generations to come and have a positive impact on society. And I don’t necessarily believe that we all have to leave our ‘“mark,” because, to quote John Green’s The Fault in Our Stars (which, if you haven’t read, is a fabulous, fabulous book) “It is very sad to me that some people are so intent on leaving their mark on the world that they don’t care if that mark is a scar.” I just want to have something that, on my death bed (which I very much hope is no time soon because I have so much I want to do in my life), that I was proud of, even if it didn’t last beyond my generation, I’d say I’d fulfilled my lifetime wish. ♦
Illustrated by Sarah and written by Francesca, or chessxoxo on the sims 3 website, hit her up so when she gets her laptop back you can do simport together, even if it’s glitchy as hell.
